| Forbes.com |
Think about the last time you partook in a professional networking event–a happy hour mixer at work or an industry conference like Dreamforce, for example. Now, complete each of the following three word fragments. Fill in the blanks to form actual words.
- W _ _ H
- S H _ _ E R
- S _ _ P
Did you think of the words “Wash”, “Shower”, “Shaver”, or “Soap”? Or did the words “Wish”, “Shaker”, “Shaper”, or “Step” come to mind?
If you’re like most people, you dreamt up the words “Wash”, “Shower”, “Shaver”, or “Soap”–words typically associated with cleanliness.
When this experiment was conducted by researchers in 2014, the results were overwhelming. Participants were asked to describe situations when they engaged in two different types of networking events: professional networking events and social networking events (i.e., hanging out with friends). After reflecting on professional networking events, participants were more likely to complete the word fragments with “Wash”, “Shower”, and “Soap”? In contrast, after reflecting on socially-fueled networking events, participants were more likely to complete the word fragments with the words “Wish”, “Shaker”, and “Step”. The researchers concluded, “although most participants viewed networking to socialize and make friends as positive, they saw networking to enhance their careers as distinctly negative…Many people find professional networking so distasteful that it makes them feel morally and physically dirty.“
If we have negative connotations associated with professional networking, not only are we less likely to partake in the activity, we’re also less likely to be effective practitioners of it. With networking being so critical to our professional success, it’s worth taking the time to reframe our beliefs about professional networking in order to make it less cringe-worthy and, instead, something we genuinely love to do and participate in.
Engage in “social” activities when networking professionally.
Networking events need not take place around roundtables and formal dinners. Why not make professional networking fun? Charlie Hoehn, author of “Play It Away: A Workaholic’s Cure for Anxiety”, recommendsscheduling a “networking meeting” as a game of catch as opposed to a standard lunch or coffee. He explains, “I just don’t like sitting around drinking stimulants and I would just rather [play catch]”. Partaking in “fun” activities–catch, pilates, cooking classes, nature walks, or wine tastings, for example–will cause you to conceptualize professional networking as less of a “need to do” and, in turn, attribute positive feelings to the practice.
Give more than you get.
We tend to resort to networking when we need something–an introduction to a lucrative customer or a positive referral for a job application. We’re less likely to network when we’re experiencing success. Recent research
You’re less likely to associate professional networking with uncleanliness if you don’t feel sleazy. If you network with the intention of helping others, especially during times when you’re own career is progressing well (and you have valuable experiential knowledge to impart), you’ll be more likely to enjoy networking. Several bodies of research have revealed that altruism makes us feel good about ourselves. It also makes us more successful. Adam Grant, in his book “Give and Take”, outlines three distinct types of individuals: givers, takers, and matchers. While givers are altruistic and give more than they receive, takers are self-seeking and exploit others. Grant’s research revealed that the most effective individuals are givers. They gain the respect of others and, in doing so, encourage others to repay the favor and open up new doors of opportunity.
Network with people outside of your profession.
The most successful networkers–the “super-connectors”–go far and wide when networking. They genuinely enjoy networking and don’t see it as a means to an end, an opportunity for personal or professional advancement. By networking with people spanning a multitude of different walks of life, super-connectors seek enjoyment in networking because it fuels their own personal curiosity. Dorie Clark, professor at Duke University’s Fuqua School of Business and author of “Entrepreneurial You, Reinventing You”, explains, “The best reason to build a professionally diverse network…isn’t about what you’ll get out of those relationships. It’s to fulfill personal curiosity and develop yourself as a person; professional or monetary ROI is a happy coincidence.”
You’ll do yourself an immense disservice if you view networking as a means to an end. By networking with a broad spectrum of individuals, even when it’s not obvious how it will help your career advancement, you’ll be more likely to reap personal satisfaction and enjoy the pursuit. Professional networking should not and need not leave a bad taste in your mouth. It’s shouldn’t leave you running for a shower or bar of soap. Simply reconceptualizing your approach to networking can move waters in terms of your willingness to embrace and benefit from this activity.